Recently, I received a message from a person with whom I was once more intimate than I am now. The less intimate way of being is new though. In the space of that newness, while asking myself, "what now?" I found that the past has a way of creeping up on the present.
The two of us had a way of engaging each other through our Tumblr blogs. Tumblr is a blog format which engages images moreso than text. One of the hallmarks of our relationship was how we communicated with each other through these journals.
A message he sent me was,
I went into a space of wonder when I read those words. For indeed the word love was something I had "used" with him. But what truly held the space of awe in me was how I feel the message is simply a patent untruth.
I responded lovingly with
(You'll notice the hearts.) Hearts because indeed it was a 'screw you' in the midst of my love for him. (I just disagree with you vehemently my dear.)
Say Love More Than You Think You Should
My belief is that love is something we feel and say far too little. Love is something we put chains on: it has to mean this, look this way, be with this person. For Westerners in general, love cannot just "be." Culturally, 'love' is far too frightening; so frightening, in fact, that collectively, we often cannot even recognize the feeling in our bodies and spirits.
A Love Opportunity
As events continued to unfold, I found myself as greeter at an ecstatic dance class. I grooved to the music as people filed in. And with my dance and a smile, I said hello, asked them to sign in, and collected the donations. Thus, I found myself in the midst of an opportunity:
A chance to love every single person that walked through the door.
Whether it was my best girlfriends (with whom love is a given) or the three men, unrelated and unknown to each other, who were returning individually to the dance after a yearlong hiatus; or the crew that showed up early to set up and create the space.
Perhaps love was best expressed toward the older gentleman who has a degenerative hip disease and walks with a cane. Even with these disabilities he comes to dance every week. He enters slowly and painfully and sits down to watch. As he can, he gets up and dances a bit. And while his dance is full of careful movement and probably a bit of pain, he is dancing and he is loving it and us.
As I greeted them all with hugs, kisses, and "I'm glad you're here," I watched others take their dance to the people that entered and do the same. And in dancing with all - even the man with the hip pain - each and every person was engaged in the act of loving.
Express Your Love Every Day
The love in this community built the dance and the dance built the community of love. If we choose not to express our love, how can we build anything? At least anything with heart.
How can we relate to each other if we're not willing to dive into the great pool of love and truly feel it? Why wouldn't I say, "I love you," when I most assuredly do.
I love easily and I love often. Does it make my love less real? In my reality it most certainly does not.
At the end of each day, what I know is that we have each other and we have our integrity.
At the basis of both--for me--is a deep rooted love: love, love, love, love, love and on to infinity.
And I will tell each person I love that I love them. Life may be the longest thing we do, but it is far too short to not share the most precious of gifts we have to offer: our love.
Love Is Freedom
I will tell you "I love you," because it is the nature of love to be expressed. Love wants to dance, sing, pray, run, jump, play, and cavort & frolic. Love wants to bask in your presence. Love wants to tap you on the shoulder and give you a big hug. Essentially, love cannot be bound, because its essence is freedom.
Love should be applied generously and outrageously.
My love...knows that the only way to love is
whole-heartedly, without reservation
And with no regard for convention.
~Fors Miner Gregg
Love should be central to everything we do. And we should feel it far too often and say it way too much, because there really is no such thing as 'too often or too much' when it comes to love.
I Love You
So my sweet and goofy friend (you know who you are), love is one of the most powerful tools we have in our toolbox. It is the "duct tape" of Youniverse, except it doesn't bind; it frees us.
I love you. I always will.
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