People often share stories about how unique they are.
How good or bad things are compared to how good or bad things could be, should be or would beThat's EGO and you have to be very careful listening to EGO.
There's a law of nature, "Nothing is Ever Missing it Just Changes in Form" and with this in mind you can understand the following conversation:
Two men walking side by side were discussing the challenges one was facing. With a worried sad feeling in his heart, shoulders stooped, Bob starts. "Things at home with my wife are quite challenging" ... then Pete replies with a smile "Yeah, me too." Bob continues, with tears in his eyes, "I just don't have any certainty about the future" Pete replies with a cheerful light heartedness, "yeah, me too." Bob's getting even more grumpy, "I'm just totally frustrated and confused" Pete replies with a whoop and a laugh, "Yeah, me too."
Bob finally turns to Pete, "you know if you keep telling me that everything that's going wrong in my life is also just as bad in your life, I'm going to punch you." Pete turns to Bob, "well it is, and punching isn't going to change that, maybe it's your expectations that could do with a punch. Seems your expectations of a challenge free relationship, of certainty about the future and the absence of frustration need a kick in the guts. Really, Bob, you are no better or worse than anybody."
You see, we get the idea that being unique is the high end of life, and for our EGO this is absolutely the truth. The more unique, separate, individualised, separated, and complicated our personality is, the more we feel that we've hit the heights, turned on the lights. But it's not 100% true.
There are two ways to see the world -- one is material the other is spiritual. One asks how separate and unique am I, how successful, wealthy and therefore safe am I? This is the vital function of our EGO.
In opposition to this, in competition in fact is LOVE.
Love doesn't ask how unique, different, safe, separate am I, it asks how the same am I?
Why does being the same breed love and why does being different breed EGO?
Individualised people can do incredible things, and often, but not always that quest to do incredible things is driven by the perception that this individual is not lovable, not worthy to be loved, as a failure, or as a normal human being. That reach for the stars is often underpinned by incredible discontent, a yearning from the deepest void, please see me and accept me. I am worthy of your love.
And the person who finds love, asks for no such recognition. However, they may still reach for the stars, this time however, they are motivated to share the love, not gain it.
To share the love one must be in a deep zone of comfort and that zone is, without doubt a sense of worthiness.
I am loved... I am lovable... I am worthy of love
No matter what I've done or not done, I am worthy of love.
This is the mantra of the heart. It seeks no approval, doesn't compete for better, or superiority. It expresses itself in love, from love to cause love. In such a relationship, this individual will not be bound by permits, rules and decisions to cause their own confinement.
This is never easy to comprehend for a person immersed in the struggle of EGO, The Ego blocks the heart, and although every EGO driven person has that heart and soul sounding loud and clear in self worth, their capacity to hear it is diminished. And from that diminished capacity a relationship becomes the voice on the outside replacing what nature and creation already implanted in every human heart, the ability to love ourselves first.
To love ourselves is not built on EGO. Whatever we achieve,say, think, do, give, spend, own, create, birth, or destroy can be taken. So, it is really the equality of our humanity, our ability to recognise that nothing is ever missing just changes in form, that really gives us the insight to get past our ego and say:
"No matter what I've done or Not done, I am worthy of love"
Chris Walker < http://www.chriswalker.com.au/ > is a visionary business consultant and of the world's leading facilitators of Personal/Professional Development. Author, consultant and professional speaker, his considered a leader in the field of human potential and lifestyles for success. His VIP and Mastery Programs have been attended by thousands of individuals around the world seeking tools to live life and manage their careers to their fullest potential. http://www.chriswalker.com.au/