You want him for yourself even though he is with another woman right now. It is not that you don't know he is with another woman. It is that you want him for yourself regardless of what he has going with any other woman. So what strategy should you use to get him to leave the other woman and be with you?
1. Be his close friend! The first step in displacing the other woman is to find a way to sneak into his life and become an essential feature in it. The key here is for you to become an 'indispensable cog' in the wheel of his life as you want him to be unable or at least very unwilling to give you up. The least threatening way to do this is to become his friend. The steps to become an appendage like friend in his life is to:
a. Research him. Think of him as your new project and focus on this project. Do your homework and find out all you can about him without his knowledge as you do not want to freak him out. What does he enjoy doing? What are his interests? What does he spend most of his time doing? What does he do in his leisure time and where does he spend most of his leisure time? Knowledge as they say is power and the more you know the better you can streamline and focus your energy and efforts.
b. Develop sufficient skill and prowess in what he likes. You want him to connect to you intellectually or by your knowledge of what he loves and the best way is to have some level of knowledge or skill in what he enjoys or spends his time doing. Don't try and wing it with ignorance or poor knowledge as he will know quickly enough if you are just faking it and your ability to get him to leave the other woman will be severely compromised. You want him to develop a connection to you through the things or activities that he is involved in. The rarer your knowledge or prowess in the hobbies or activities that he likes the better will be your chances of connecting intellectually with him.
2. Connect with him at any cost! You must now find a way to spend time with him so that he and you can begin to share a special intellectual connection using your new found wealth of knowledge and skills. You don't want him to know that your motive is to impress him so your conversation should be casual just as it is when you talk to a friend. Let the conversation flow naturally and don't give in to the temptation to dominate the conversation with your interesting new knowledge. Give him enough conversation so that he remembers you favorably and would not mind hanging out with you again. And proceed naturally from there until he considers you as a friend with whom he has an uncommon connection.
3. Be feminine! To get him to leave the other woman you must let him see the woman that you are as you connect intellectually with him. Make sure that you keep reminding him that you are a fully grown woman who is unattached, interesting, full of joy and thinks that he is great; and that his woman must be one of the luckiest women on the earth. Your aim is for him to become increasingly enthralled by you and less with the other woman. When he complains that she is not treating him right be sympathetic but wonder aloud how she could treat such a great guy so badly but do not bad mouth her as you will come across as a shrew. Whatever wedges you see in their relationship use them to make yourself look good by letting him know subtly that you would never treat him like that but do not criticize the other woman out rightly. If you have been successful in becoming one of his good friends then opportunities to build yourself at the other woman's expense will abound and you must use them well.
If you follow these 3 steps then it's just a matter of time before he leaves the other woman to be with you. Once you have replaced the other woman you must keep doing what you did to win him over otherwise another conniving woman may also take him away from you. If his relationship with the other woman is solid then replacing her may take a lot more time and you must be sure that it's something you want to pursue as it will take a lot from you.
If you manage to become his friend but are not sure about his romantic feelings for you then I would recommend these physical signs of attraction or these signs that he likes you so that you can know what's going on with him. Rosy Anderson is a researcher in social economic issues and the way they affect decision making; and she enjoys writing and being in healthy, happy relationships.